Our Infertility Adoption Story- There's No Such Thing As An Unwanted Child or Pregnancy

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Sorry...I've Been Busy

Sorry, it's been a while since my last blog.  We've been super busy!  We began our PRIDE classes on Oct 12th and 13th.  We've had our physicals and TB tests.  All of our animals have been to the vet and are licensed.  99.9999% of our paperwork is done.  We just have a couple of stragglers that need to be finished up and still need to take our CPR/First Aid/Blood born pathogen class on Nov 3rd.

On October 15th I had something monumental happen.  I ordered a crib!!  I literally cried after I pressed 'ENTER' on the keyboard.  It may not seem like that big of a deal to any one else but I have waited a LONG time to do that.  I've always been the one to help host baby showers.  I'm always shopping for everyone else's baby showers, always wondering when it would be my turn.  One of my friends is wanting to throw a shower for me and it feels SO weird to me.  For one there's the fact that it just seems like such a foreign concept to me. And secondly, our situation is a little different.  We'll be doing "foster-to-adopt".  We're working with a place where the primary focus is foster care.  We have no idea of who our first foster child might be.  What age?  What gender? It is my hope that we get a young infant but that may not happen.  My Grandma had offered to buy our crib.  In order to show her the one I'd chosen I went online at Babies R US and put together a wishlist.  (Kind of like a baby registry without having to have a birth date.)  Before I knew it I was "Oh look a diaper bag...oh look at that blanket...ooooooohh a wipee warmer!"  Because I want a newborn of course my "wishes" all gravitated towards newborn/infant care/needs.  I had so much fun putting that list together...another thing I've waited a long time to do.  Anyhow, that being said...do you throw showers for foster parents?? I mean, yes there are things we'll need when a child is placed with us.  There are things I would like to have on hand in case of a late night child placement with us, rather than having to make a midnight run to Walmart.  It just feels weird for it to be MY shower....surreal.  I keep waiting to wake up.  Everything's gone so smooth up to this point.  I don't know if that's a sign of things to come or if God's giving me a break with this process because it's going to get difficult and I'll need the strength later on.

Well I guess not everything's going smoothly...There are MAJOR changes coming soon at my job.  Layoffs and "restructuring".  With these changes it looks like if I want to stay as a part time employee I will have to change departments/shifts.  If I want to stay in the department that I've been in for 13 years, I'll have to go back to working full time.  I'm REALLY struggling with the decision.  I LOVE working part time.  I feel like I worked a long time towards getting a part time position, like it was my reward for hanging in there.  I loved being able to spend my days off with my niece.  God allowed me that.  Now as I'm "expecting" our foster children, I may have to go to full time?? Just doesn't seem fair.  I flip flop back and forth between "I love being part time" and "what is an extra 10 hours a week anyway".  I hate that we'll finally have children in our home and I may have to put them in daycare?  What's the point of being a foster mom if someone else is going to be raising the children for more than 8 hours per day??  Maybe it's God way of providing...maybe I'll work full time for a year, be able to pay off the credit card, while we have foster children.  Maybe after that is when a "legally free/adoptable" child becomes available and after everything's paid off I can quit altogether??  Your prayers as we make this decision would be greatly appreciated.

There's some cleaning, organizing and painting to be done then comes the homestudy!  Your prayers for that would be appreciated too ;)

Thanks again to everyone for all of your support and encouragement.  We greatly appreciate it!

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