The Dance

I knew the day would come. Unfortunately,  that doesn't make this any easier.  We knew going in to this that Sweet Pea wouldn't be staying forever and now the time is upon us for her return home.  Of course, we're grateful that she is able to go home but our hearts and our home now have a void that just can't be explained.
When I was in high school, Garth Brooks had a song called "The Dance ".  Not until recently have the lyrics been echoing through my mind.
I could have gone this past 18 months without the "joys" of parenthood like teething,  sleepless nights, frightening trips to the urgent care, breathing treatments,  diaper rashes, etc. But then I would've had to miss my first mother's day,  first family portraits, planning the first birthday party and the first time putting out cookies for Santa.  I could have gone the rest of my life without scooping poop out of the tub...twice, but then I might have missed all the fun of soapy hairdos,  bubble beards, and her giggles when she would splash me or pour water on my head.  I could have gone without the pain of packing up her little suitcase but I would have missed out on all the shopping for cute little pink frilly outfits. I could've done without packing up all of her toys and books but then I would've missed out on all the block towers built and all the stories we read together.

I could have gone the rest of my life never knowing the heartache of saying " goodbye" to her but I would have missed the immeasurable joy of saying " hi" to her one April evening.

I could've missed the pain but then I'd have had to miss the dance.