"Are you quitting?" "Is she sick or something?" "Did something happen?"...These are questions that I've heard this week regarding my decision to step down from the Lead Receptionist position at work. It was NOT an easy decision for me. I loved that job and really liked the other Leads that I worked with.
The decision came after much thought and consideration, weighing pros and cons. For those who don't know, I am a part time employee. I work only 30 hours a week doing a job that for me, clearly required the full 40 hour work week. The job specifications are that of a "working lead" meaning that I do the work AND have additional duties added. More recently I found it increasingly difficult to find that balance between managing the work and doing the work. In my desire to focus and excel in my job and in my personal life (with having a baby) i found that I couldn't focus or excel in either. At work, I felt like I was consistently dropping the ball, forgetting to do something, or just plain didn't have the time to do it. I would rather do one thing well than to do many things half-assed. With the feelings of failure this week in the "baby department" I was just overwhelmed when the feelings of failure at work came up too. I'm tired of feeling like I just suck at everything I do lately. I want to be able to do a good job in whatever I do. It's not fair to the team I lead or to my fellow Leads if I am not able to do a good job and they have to pick up any slack. This is why I stepped down from the position. I want to be able to focus and get back to being the best darn referral coordinator I can be.
Anyhow, I attended my last Leads meeting today and had the opportunity to tell the other leads what a pleasure it's been to work with them in this capacity for the last few years. I'll say it again, those guys are THE best team I've ever worked with and I'm so appreciative of the opportunity I had to work with them as Lead. I look forward to continuing to work with them, in this different capacity